Fun Cart
I must warn you, this post is going to be NEGATIVE. Negative Nancy invaded my house and wrote this.
Do you know what the fun cart is? You don't. Probably because you realize that thing is straight up from the Devil Himself and there ain't nuthin' fun about that aggravating pain the a$$ and so you are smart enough to never use it. That didn't clear it up for you? Here's a picture.
Ooooh. The "Fun Cart."
I HATE the "Fun Cart." H. A. T. E. it. Alexa LOVES it. When she sees one, she runs screaming to it, "IT'S THE FUN CART!!!!! YEAH!!!!!" Why do I let her use it? Because she's spoiled rotten. The whole time I am pushing that horrific thing through the store, I am cursing it silently in my head. I am thinking sarcastic comments about it.
Why do I hate this type of cart so much? There hard as pooh to steer, for one thing. It's a whole body work out. Try turning that thing around a tight corner, or try to pass another cart on an aisle- you can't push pick it up and maneuver it to the right or left. Hell no. That thing weighs a freaking ton. Plus it always seems to get jammed up on the toy aisle, which in Target is a bit narrow anyway. With the "Fun Cart" that aisle is like a parking spot for compact cars, and you're trying to park an 18-wheeler . For another thing, you'll have finally got the damn thing in a rhythm and you're cruising down the aisle, when suddenly the passenger sees something and literally catapults themself off the cart- which throws off the momentum and the cart goes all cattywumpus and then you're crashing into some old lady who is NOT humored by your impulsive, out of control kid. Another mark against it is: the one pictured was LOUD. Like- so loud that Alexa couldn't even hear the terrible, sarcastic things I was saying about how loud and awful it was. She was facing me and sitting right under my mouth and kept going, "WHAT? I DIDN'T HEAR YOU!" To which I responded, "Exactly." The final thing I hate about it- is it's a cesspool of germs. While Alexa is no longer trying to put the harness straps in her mouth- she is constantly buckling and unbuckling herself. (which is a huge issue in itself, because she can't unbuckle herself. Then she starts freaking out because "I CAN'T GET UNBUCKLED!!!!" (well- all of Target wanted to know- so good thing you screamed that out. And why haven't we learned our lesson after the 300th time????) She has her hands all over those nasty buckles. Today- she had her shoes off and was crawling around all over it. She probably has hook-worms or something.
So again, why do I get the doggone cart that I literally despise? Because, I am a mom. I pick my battles. If it means I can get through Target, Wal Mart or Harris Teeter, a little bit faster . . . then I'll suck it up and blog about how much I hate it.
Do you know what the fun cart is? You don't. Probably because you realize that thing is straight up from the Devil Himself and there ain't nuthin' fun about that aggravating pain the a$$ and so you are smart enough to never use it. That didn't clear it up for you? Here's a picture.
Ooooh. The "Fun Cart."
I HATE the "Fun Cart." H. A. T. E. it. Alexa LOVES it. When she sees one, she runs screaming to it, "IT'S THE FUN CART!!!!! YEAH!!!!!" Why do I let her use it? Because she's spoiled rotten. The whole time I am pushing that horrific thing through the store, I am cursing it silently in my head. I am thinking sarcastic comments about it.
Why do I hate this type of cart so much? There hard as pooh to steer, for one thing. It's a whole body work out. Try turning that thing around a tight corner, or try to pass another cart on an aisle- you can't push pick it up and maneuver it to the right or left. Hell no. That thing weighs a freaking ton. Plus it always seems to get jammed up on the toy aisle, which in Target is a bit narrow anyway. With the "Fun Cart" that aisle is like a parking spot for compact cars, and you're trying to park an 18-wheeler . For another thing, you'll have finally got the damn thing in a rhythm and you're cruising down the aisle, when suddenly the passenger sees something and literally catapults themself off the cart- which throws off the momentum and the cart goes all cattywumpus and then you're crashing into some old lady who is NOT humored by your impulsive, out of control kid. Another mark against it is: the one pictured was LOUD. Like- so loud that Alexa couldn't even hear the terrible, sarcastic things I was saying about how loud and awful it was. She was facing me and sitting right under my mouth and kept going, "WHAT? I DIDN'T HEAR YOU!" To which I responded, "Exactly." The final thing I hate about it- is it's a cesspool of germs. While Alexa is no longer trying to put the harness straps in her mouth- she is constantly buckling and unbuckling herself. (which is a huge issue in itself, because she can't unbuckle herself. Then she starts freaking out because "I CAN'T GET UNBUCKLED!!!!" (well- all of Target wanted to know- so good thing you screamed that out. And why haven't we learned our lesson after the 300th time????) She has her hands all over those nasty buckles. Today- she had her shoes off and was crawling around all over it. She probably has hook-worms or something.
So again, why do I get the doggone cart that I literally despise? Because, I am a mom. I pick my battles. If it means I can get through Target, Wal Mart or Harris Teeter, a little bit faster . . . then I'll suck it up and blog about how much I hate it.
You crack me up. I love being your bff.
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