Distract and Deflect
This morning, while we were eating breakfast, I announced that I was going to re-paint the cabinets this summer. Doug looks thoughtful and he says, "You know, what if we took this cabinet out, got a new stove, and then we could put in that new breakfast area, but only if we replace the window. Let's just redo the kitchen." I responded, "Only if we hire someone to do all that work."
When we first bought our house, we were major DIY-ers. We did it all. We've re-done the kitchen, put in all new windows, new flooring, a new deck, and tons of landscaping. We've done it all. The last 4 years, we haven't really done hardly anything around the house. Oh, we talk about it, but nothing ever seems to get done. We don't seem to ever get a project started, much less completed.
Today, I discovered why. See, when I announced my plan to repaint the cabinets, Doug began the old "Distract and Deflect" maneuver. I announced a project, and he distracted me with this elaborate, expensive plan that I will never agree to. He knows I won't agree to it. That's his counterattack. Just in case his counterattack is half way sincere, I counter, his counter attack with a deflection- and announce that I'll only agree to his over the top plan, if he'll hire someone. I know he'll never agree to hiring someone. Doug is a firm believer in- doing the job himself. And that is how nothing ever gets done. We've distracted each other to the point that neither of us remember the original announcement, and our Lowe's card remains safe yet again.
When we first bought our house, we were major DIY-ers. We did it all. We've re-done the kitchen, put in all new windows, new flooring, a new deck, and tons of landscaping. We've done it all. The last 4 years, we haven't really done hardly anything around the house. Oh, we talk about it, but nothing ever seems to get done. We don't seem to ever get a project started, much less completed.
Today, I discovered why. See, when I announced my plan to repaint the cabinets, Doug began the old "Distract and Deflect" maneuver. I announced a project, and he distracted me with this elaborate, expensive plan that I will never agree to. He knows I won't agree to it. That's his counterattack. Just in case his counterattack is half way sincere, I counter, his counter attack with a deflection- and announce that I'll only agree to his over the top plan, if he'll hire someone. I know he'll never agree to hiring someone. Doug is a firm believer in- doing the job himself. And that is how nothing ever gets done. We've distracted each other to the point that neither of us remember the original announcement, and our Lowe's card remains safe yet again.
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