Revenge
I don't know if you have ever noticed this about Doug, but he ALWAYS has his cell phone with him. He often has it out and is either texting, or playing some stupid game on it. Because of that fact, it aggravates me to NO end that he NEVER answers me when I call him. I mean- seriously- dude I know you have your phone! You always do. Until I call and that is the one time all day- he mysteriously has the volume turned off, or not on his person. (yeah right!)
The other thing that aggravates me about that whole thing is- it's not like I call him 4-5 times a day. I might call him 3 or 4 times a WEEK. So if I am calling it's because it's important, like "My plans changed and I can pick up the kids." Typically we have things like who's picking up the kids worked out before we leave in the morning, or if we're gonna go wild and crazy and eat dinner out.
Crazy enough- that situation occurred yesterday, my plans changed and I could pick up, even though he was going to. I tried to call Doug . . . but go figure he didn't have his phone on or whatever the story is. So I drove over to the school and he was picking up Andrew. I told him I'd get Alexa. While I was on my way to get her, I decided I would have revenge on him for being such an aggravation about not answering his doggone phone. I was going to change my contact info in his phone, so that I would now be called "Sexy Girlfriend." muaa haha haha!!!!! I bet that would really throw him off! (you clearly don't want a piece of me, because when I get revenge, boy I am unmerciful. Just straight up evil. Or not). Then I thought . . . it would be funnier if I did a stripper name. Then I thought, no I'll do one of those names with a lot of innuendo in them. So I Googled "Austin Powers female characters" and I found the perfect name. The trick was going to be being patient because I had to wait until he didn't have his phone on his person, and not be real obvious that I am up to no good (which let's be honest- that was the real challenge for me).
The perfect opportunity came this morning when he took the dog for her morning walk. I quick dashed to his phone and brought up my contact information. I went to his favorites file- (which I am not on. I am 4th from the top. 4th!!!! the mother of his children is not at the top of his favorites! It's probably because I do aggravating things like change my name in his contacts though) and changed my name to: Ivanna Humpalot. I made it out of the house and all the way to school- without telling him!!!! However, I laughed all the way to school thinking about what he would think when he saw, "Ivanna Humpalot" was calling him. Then, when I got to school, one of the assistant principals gave me a reason to call Doug- we were getting early dismissal (due to all the snow, we have not yet gotten as of 4pm).
When he answers the phone he's laughing. I told him my news, and then he says, "So I see you've been messing with my contact information." I pretended like I had no idea what he was talking about and then asked why he would answer a phone call from a girl with such a scandalous name?!!!!
I've laughed about this all day- and keep doing so. I am pretty sure Doug doesn't think this is as funny as I do, because he's already changed his contact back. I wonder if it says, my name or, "Pain in the Butt."
The other thing that aggravates me about that whole thing is- it's not like I call him 4-5 times a day. I might call him 3 or 4 times a WEEK. So if I am calling it's because it's important, like "My plans changed and I can pick up the kids." Typically we have things like who's picking up the kids worked out before we leave in the morning, or if we're gonna go wild and crazy and eat dinner out.
Crazy enough- that situation occurred yesterday, my plans changed and I could pick up, even though he was going to. I tried to call Doug . . . but go figure he didn't have his phone on or whatever the story is. So I drove over to the school and he was picking up Andrew. I told him I'd get Alexa. While I was on my way to get her, I decided I would have revenge on him for being such an aggravation about not answering his doggone phone. I was going to change my contact info in his phone, so that I would now be called "Sexy Girlfriend." muaa haha haha!!!!! I bet that would really throw him off! (you clearly don't want a piece of me, because when I get revenge, boy I am unmerciful. Just straight up evil. Or not). Then I thought . . . it would be funnier if I did a stripper name. Then I thought, no I'll do one of those names with a lot of innuendo in them. So I Googled "Austin Powers female characters" and I found the perfect name. The trick was going to be being patient because I had to wait until he didn't have his phone on his person, and not be real obvious that I am up to no good (which let's be honest- that was the real challenge for me).
The perfect opportunity came this morning when he took the dog for her morning walk. I quick dashed to his phone and brought up my contact information. I went to his favorites file- (which I am not on. I am 4th from the top. 4th!!!! the mother of his children is not at the top of his favorites! It's probably because I do aggravating things like change my name in his contacts though) and changed my name to: Ivanna Humpalot. I made it out of the house and all the way to school- without telling him!!!! However, I laughed all the way to school thinking about what he would think when he saw, "Ivanna Humpalot" was calling him. Then, when I got to school, one of the assistant principals gave me a reason to call Doug- we were getting early dismissal (due to all the snow, we have not yet gotten as of 4pm).
When he answers the phone he's laughing. I told him my news, and then he says, "So I see you've been messing with my contact information." I pretended like I had no idea what he was talking about and then asked why he would answer a phone call from a girl with such a scandalous name?!!!!
I've laughed about this all day- and keep doing so. I am pretty sure Doug doesn't think this is as funny as I do, because he's already changed his contact back. I wonder if it says, my name or, "Pain in the Butt."
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