Conflicting Business

In honor of Mother's Day, I'll admit that today's post was inspired by my very own mother (she's inspired other posts, but like the true spoiled, oldest child I am- I will continue to take credit for them)!

I was talking about the plans for summer- and I said something about how I like my kids to be me with as much as possible, but then they make me totally crazy at the same time.  And my wise ole' mom said, "Yes- motherhood is conflicting like that."  And in about a span of 2 seconds a thousand examples of motherhood being conflicting ran through my mind. 

Example #1 (don't worry- I am not going to give all 1,00 examples- that would take forever!!!!)
Right after I had Andrew, I enjoyed a summer at home with him and then as soon as school started back, so did I.  There was a LOT of crying- on my part.  I felt HORRIBLE leaving my beautiful baby at daycare!  But (here's the conflicting part) I felt horrible- ENJOYING being back at work!!!!  How could I miss him so much- and be so glad to be at work at the same time?! 

Example #2 This summer, Andrew will be home with me all summer (with the exception of a week or two of camps and playdates with friends) and Alexa will be dropped from full time to part time at daycare.  I am sooooo excited to be at home with Big A and Little A and I am planning all kinds of day trips and visits with friends and stuff, but then I also know there will be moments (probably several within an hour time period) where they will drive me NUTS!  Especially now that Alexa is crawling, pulling up, and crusing and is into EVERYTHING.  (This morning I caught her trying to put a pen in an electric socket- Andrew NEVER even noticed electric sockets.  Alexa's already trying to put things in them.  Toddlerhood is going to be long and fraught with troubles with this one I tell ya.)

Example #3 Yesterday Alexa decided she didn't really need much of a nap.  Despite my efforts to convince her otherwise she said, "Nah- I'm good mom."  She was wrong.  She NEEDED a nap!  She was a GROUCH.  At 4:30 we started the countdown until 6:30- when I could get her ready for bed and it wasn't too unreasonable of a time to go to bed.  Let me assure you, she was grumpy for those 2 hours!  And yet . . . I wanted to sit and hold her and not put her to bed.  How is it that I was so looking forward to her going to bed and yet when the time came . . . I didn't- I held her instead? 

Ahhh, the conflictions of motherhood, but they're totally worth it. 

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