Sleep With One Eye Open

Poor Doug.  I have issued 2 threats to him, within a 12 hour period.

Doug and I came down with a stomach bug within minutes of one another on Tuesday.  Honestly, the timing is quite bizarre.  He dashed into one bathroom, and minutes later I dashed into the other.  Y'all that stomach bug is no fun!  However . . . I haven't had to eat one cookie in 2 days, and the ones I ate the night before I got sick were all free calories.  :-)

I felt terrible.  I felt terrible physically, and I was guilt ridden.  Poor Andrew and especially Alexa. Andrew had friends I kicked him out to play with, but Alexa . . . her friends are gone this week.  She and I made a list of things we were going to do this week.  It was supposed to be a week of fun!!!! She handled it like a champ.  She was only too happy to watch Netflix for the entire morning while I recovered.  Unfortunately, later Tuesday evening we had make plans to go to our favorite college team's baseball game with a few other families that included friends for Andrew and Alexa.  I forced myself to recover, and take them.  We really had no other fun plans for Spring Break, and they were really looking forward to going.  I took them.  Doug stayed home.  I stayed for most of the game.  A game that included 9 pitching changes from the opposing team.  The game lasted FOREVER!!!!  Our team was ahead by quite a margin.  I made our crew leave at the bottom of the 9th inning.  I was exhausted.  My body hurt.  I was freezing cold.  All I wanted to do was get home, into my bed, and sleep.

Once I had Alexa in bed, and the dog walked for her final walk of the night, I crashed.  I was bundled up with my rice bag on feet- so they would finally warm up.  I was sound asleep on the couch (when Doug or I are sick, I cannot sleep with him.  I hate the idea of breathing our germs back and forth. It's weird.  You already know I am).   I was so warm and cozy. My pillow was soft, and my feet were finally warm.  Suddenly the stupid *&%^ing ice maker starts knocking.  I don't know what's wrong with that thing, except that it's broken.  I frequently kindly ask my family to NOT turn that damn thing on.  They don't listen.

Y'all there is no rage, quite like the "over tired, recovering from a stomach bug, and someone turned on the stupid ice maker that doesn't work" rage.  Doug came dashing down the steps to help me.  I turned to him, as I was dealing with it, and said, "IF YOU TURN THIS THING ON AGAIN, I WILL KILL YOU."  Then I turned the ice maker off, got back on the couch, and went to sleep.  Two hours later . . . the &*^%^*& thing went off again!!!!!!  I was enraged.  I considered going upstairs and hovering over Doug with my pillow, like I was going to smother him, until he woke up (I wasn't really going to smother him- I just wanted to freak him out).  I figured that would scare the bejeezus out of him. Except . . . that was way too much work.  So I went back to sleep, where I had no further problems with the ice maker because I turned it off.  But when I woke up in the morning, I knew he turned that ice maker on.  I just knew it.  How rude and insensitive of him.  When he woke up, I told him that I considered smothering him with the pillow last night, after my 2nd time dealing with the ice maker.  He just laughed.  (He shouldn't have.  I was pretty close to really doing it.  Again- ice maker rage people.  It's justifiable, and I am sure defendable. Any woman judge would get it).

Later that day, I issued Doug yet another "sleep with one open" threat.  Here's the text I sent him: "You took the clean clothes out of the dryer and put them on the dirty clothes.  Now knowing what's clean and what's dirty- I now have 2 extra loads of laundry to do.  Plus- finish the load you started. And you missed the fall out from the fashion crisis, because the clothes she wanted to wear, are back in the wash.  Sleep with one eye open tonight, so you can defend yourself when I try to smother you."

All I can say is, now that we have fully recovered from the stomach bug, and all of the laundry is finally done, I am not quite sure what overcame me.  Obviously that virus is a real bitch though.  :-)

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