Crazy Cat
We always take the dog out for one last walk of the night. Depending on which one of us takes her- that walk happens anywhere between 9:30pm and 12:30am.
The other night, Doug comes dashing in the door. He's talking all about how this weird black cat chased him and the dog home. He mentioned it SEVERAL times the following day. I should probably have been more sympathetic. I mean, Doug isn't exactly a scaredy cat (hahaha, see what I did there). That's me. He doesn't imagine werewolves in the bushes, or rabid animals stalking him. That's all me. He's also not one to embellish, for the sake of a good story. I don't do that either- for the record. My stories are all completely accurate. You can count on me to tell the facts, and only the facts. (I need to make sure you know that- because the following tale is straight up for real.)
You should also know three things: 1 our dog HATES cats, 2 the dog is a great big old wuss. She's good for giving and receiving affection, eating left over eggs, and keeping the dog food company and veterinarians in business. And 3 I have TERRIBLE night vision. I can't see a doggone thing.
I took the dog for her last walk of the night, last night. We were tripping along down the road, completely unaware of any scary business that might occur. I'm standing there, under a street light, waiting for her to finish sniffing one of her favorite spots, when suddenly she busts out her big girl bark. I turn around, but I can't see anything. Then suddenly about 10 yards up from us, there's this black . . . thing. Suddenly it starts moving, towards us! I was like, "OH NO!!! It's the freaking black cat!!!!" I take the dog across the road, away from the cat. I started to freak a little bit, so my dog and I are walking briskly back towards home. I am searching all over for this stupid cat, but it's black and I have terrible night vision. I can't see it anywhere. Is it gone? Back in the bushes? Or is like a horror movie cat, and now it's somehow up in front of us and going to jump out at us????? I don't know. The more I think about it, the more I am freaking out. I mean, where is that cat?!!!!!! A car comes by, and in it's lights I can see the cat. It has crossed the street, and is coming up behind us. At this point, y'all I am running, except I am wearing Doug's flops. I can't run in those, and I am laughing at how ridiculous this is. We are literally running from a cat. But I mean, my God that cat is totally creepy. Who has ever heard of a cat chasing someone like that?!!! The dog and I barrel in the door, we're out of breath: me from laughing and running, and the dog . . . because that's the most physical activity she's had in weeks. I can hardly speak I am laughing so hard.
Finally, I get out that we had a cat encounter, and Doug can take the dog for her last night walk from now on. There ain't no way I'm going out there, with that crazy thing out there. I think that cat is a Stephen King creature come to reality. I better watch Pet Sematary so Doug will know how to fight it off.
The other night, Doug comes dashing in the door. He's talking all about how this weird black cat chased him and the dog home. He mentioned it SEVERAL times the following day. I should probably have been more sympathetic. I mean, Doug isn't exactly a scaredy cat (hahaha, see what I did there). That's me. He doesn't imagine werewolves in the bushes, or rabid animals stalking him. That's all me. He's also not one to embellish, for the sake of a good story. I don't do that either- for the record. My stories are all completely accurate. You can count on me to tell the facts, and only the facts. (I need to make sure you know that- because the following tale is straight up for real.)
You should also know three things: 1 our dog HATES cats, 2 the dog is a great big old wuss. She's good for giving and receiving affection, eating left over eggs, and keeping the dog food company and veterinarians in business. And 3 I have TERRIBLE night vision. I can't see a doggone thing.
I took the dog for her last walk of the night, last night. We were tripping along down the road, completely unaware of any scary business that might occur. I'm standing there, under a street light, waiting for her to finish sniffing one of her favorite spots, when suddenly she busts out her big girl bark. I turn around, but I can't see anything. Then suddenly about 10 yards up from us, there's this black . . . thing. Suddenly it starts moving, towards us! I was like, "OH NO!!! It's the freaking black cat!!!!" I take the dog across the road, away from the cat. I started to freak a little bit, so my dog and I are walking briskly back towards home. I am searching all over for this stupid cat, but it's black and I have terrible night vision. I can't see it anywhere. Is it gone? Back in the bushes? Or is like a horror movie cat, and now it's somehow up in front of us and going to jump out at us????? I don't know. The more I think about it, the more I am freaking out. I mean, where is that cat?!!!!!! A car comes by, and in it's lights I can see the cat. It has crossed the street, and is coming up behind us. At this point, y'all I am running, except I am wearing Doug's flops. I can't run in those, and I am laughing at how ridiculous this is. We are literally running from a cat. But I mean, my God that cat is totally creepy. Who has ever heard of a cat chasing someone like that?!!! The dog and I barrel in the door, we're out of breath: me from laughing and running, and the dog . . . because that's the most physical activity she's had in weeks. I can hardly speak I am laughing so hard.
Finally, I get out that we had a cat encounter, and Doug can take the dog for her last night walk from now on. There ain't no way I'm going out there, with that crazy thing out there. I think that cat is a Stephen King creature come to reality. I better watch Pet Sematary so Doug will know how to fight it off.
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