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Showing posts from January, 2018

I Deserve an Award for Meritorious Use of a Thesaurus

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I decided it was high time to clean out the freezer after I bought something, and had to cram it in and close the door real fast, and hope the door sealed so everything didn't defrost.  We used to have a deep freezer, but I got rid of that because that's where food went to either: get freezer burnt, due to length of time in there, or rot because when I was shoving more stuff in there- I didn't close the door well enough and everything melted.  Or I used it to store secret stashes of treats that I didn't want anyone to know about.  Either way- it was a waste of food and electricity.  It needed to go. We’ve been making some good progress getting the freezer cleaned out.  We've been eating chicken, london broil, bbq, ravioli with meatballs, and I discovered some frozen peaches, which reminded me of a green smoothie recipe I wanted to try. The last 5 mornings I have been enjoying my green tea peach smoothie. You know the best part of a green smoothie?  I feel so .

Fart Machine

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I bought Andrew a fart machine for Christmas.  It's remote control.  It seemed like the kind of thing a 7th grader would really dig.  I was right.   So, I put it in a gift bag, but I kept the remote out. I decided that while we were unwrapping our Christmas gifts, I would sporadically set the fart machine off.  Oh man did I laugh at how funny that would be.  I mean . . . farts on Christmas morning?! Oh my gosh.  How funny.  (yes.  I know.  I have a very childish sense of humor.).  It was a bit of a disappointment when no one really reacted to it- but it has since made up for it.  Because the remote can work from a pretty good distance.   One night, over break Andrew had a couple of friends spend the night.  They snuck downstairs and apparently hid it in my room.  I was folding laundry when I heard it go off.  I spent 15 minutes crawling around on the floor by Doug's dresser waiting for them to hit the button (up in the bonus room- on the other side of the house) so

She's a Sly One

Lately, I have really enjoyed watching Alexa's personality mature.  She's still so sweet.  Sometimes her little face kills me.  It's still full of innocence and sweetness- most of the time.  She gets a mischievous, devious gleam in her eye when it comes to her brother, though.  Alexa learned a long time ago that Andrew is: faster, bigger, and worldlier (I mean, he can anticipate her revenge, and do preemptive strikes against her.)  What Andrew cannot match up with is subtlety.  He doesn't see it happening.  He is incapable of dealing with it.  Alexa has subtlety, and it's only going to improve as she gets older.  I LOVE watching it in action.   Back over Christmas, Andrew, Alexa, and I were playing a game with my parents.  The game went like this: Alexa read a joke off of a card.  She "awarded" points to "whoever" answered the joke correctly- first. It was a game she made up, and she was the judge of how many points people earned, or i

Getting Ready

I have a friend coming to visit this weekend.  I'm super excited because she's one of my oldest friends, and we haven't seen each other in almost a year, so we've got some catching up to do.  This will be her first time coming to my current house.  I found myself doing some pretty weird things because she's coming.  I bet y'all do normal stuff like: dust, vacuum, clean the bathrooms when people come to your houses  You know- typical house cleaning stuff.  Well- I've known her long enough that I'm not particularly stressed about that.  (Don't worry- I'll clean your bathroom . . . I'll clean your toilet . . . I'll make Andrew wipe down the toilet with a Clorox wipe).  We lived together.  We've vacationed together. I don't need my house super clean to impress her.  However, I did need to: 1. repot a plant. 2. Take a sticker off of the galvanized bucket the repotted plant sits in (the sticker has been on that bucket for MONTHS. 

After Dark Rule

Have I told you about "The After Dark Rule?"  Basically, if Doug or I are out after dark . . . you bring home chocolate.  It was easier when the kids were little because: 1- they had no knowledge of it (therefore, they couldn't think it applied to them.  It doesn't.  It's only for the grown folks, but then the young folks get fussy if they're not included, which defeats the whole premise: illicit chocolate.  Duh.  Illicit chocolate tastes better and has less calories.)  2- the lines get a little blurry with kids  It used to be if you were out- you brought it home.  Now . . . Doug's at Andrew's practice.  Practice isn't exactly conducive to stopping by the store and getting chocolate.  I mean he could- but it's a whole other stop- and you have to include Andrew.  (now it's not illicit)  Sometimes he drops Andrew at practice and goes to stores- then he could sneak chocolate home, but . . . that happens so much then it's not special ch