The Trouble With Text Messaging

I recently made it possible for Alexa to use the text messaging option on her ipad.  She's a texting maniac.  "Where are you?"  "I love you!" "I miss you"  She sends my mother and a long time family friend texts.  (No worries . . . I monitor this and Andrew's texts- and she can't initiate contact with people that I have not set up for her).
Keep this in mind.  Alexa, a young student.  She just completed first grade and yet, is a FAR better texter than her brother.  Andrew texts me as though he's a male.  Oh. Wait.  He is.  In every possible way, Andrew is male.  I get the most aggravating texts from him.  The other day he went to Carowinds with friends. I was trying to find out when or even if I should pick him up from the friend. This is our text exchange (in case you are unsure- I'm the blue boxes, and Andrew is the grey):

How is a person supposed to determine what the heck I was supposed to do?  Alexa was with me, while I was attempting to decipher these messages and I turned to her and said, "Alexa- please continue to text me, the way you do.  Don't start texting like your brother.  I'll always be confused and annoyed."  

However . . . Alexa's text messages create problems too.  I had left her and Andrew alone one morning to meet a friend for some exercising.  (I feel comfortable with this because Doug works a few miles from our home, and they're both fairly trustworthy, and it's in the morning before either one has woken up and figured out something to argue about.)  However, when I got out of the pool, I checked my phone and had this message from Alexa: 

Huh.  That is strange.  I tried to FaceTime her . . . no answer.  I called Andrew.  No answer.  I FaceTimed Andrew . . . no answer. I called Doug.  He hadn't heard from either kid.  I was on the verge of reaching panic; except . . . I am fairly practical and rational and knew that what had most likely occurred was, Alexa texted me.  Andrew woke up.  Solved the problem, and then they went upstairs to play- not taking any devices.  However, I was ready to open the door to the house and discover a catastrophe.  No catastrophes.  It was as I thought- they were upstairs playing with no device nearby.  We had a conversation about: Andrew needs to take the password off of his phone, and they need to keep a device nearby for me to get in contact with them- so I won't freak out.    On a total other note, see how well she texts?!!!  That is a totally readable text.  WAAYYY better than Andrew's.  I get random letters from him: "Y"  or "K"  I hate reading hieroglyphics when I just want to read a text message!

Now here's the other problem- Andrew has gone to hang out with friends.  He's going to spend the night.  He's having a fabulous time- but why isn't he texting me to tell me?  Why is he not sending me detailed texts of all the fun he's having?  I sent this: 

Surprisingly- I have still not heard from him.  It doesn't matter, when he texts me, it'll be some random letter like, "B."  What does that even mean?  Bye- I've run away to live with this other fun family forever?  "B . . .  was the beginning of a message where he asked for help as he was being kidnapped by the Russian Mob and couldn't finish the message?!!!  I don't know!!!!!!!!!!!!  With all of this communication available to us, you would think we'd communicate better!